Eyes of Clarity

Psalms 51:2-3 “Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin. For I acknowledge my transgressions, and my sin is always before me.” Broken. I feel as though my heart has shattered into a thousand pieces. I am on a downhill fall and I am unsure how to make it stop. The pain, the hurt, the trauma. What am I supposed to do when I am on an island over 1,000 miles away from home? I can run to the comfort of my depression and I can hide from the faces of my teammates, but I cannot hide from the presence of the Lord. My only options are to give these struggles to the Lord or remain at a standstill with the enemy, giving him yet again another chance to have victory over my soul. However, I am no longer willing to allow the enemy victory, therefore, the battle of my mind rages on as it never has before. I came to Potter’s Field for change; I came to Potter’s Field to overcome; I came to Potter’s Field to finally choose Jesus. Romans 8:18 reminds me, “For I consider that t

Deuteronomy 9:6 “Therefore understand that the Lord your God is not giving you this good land to possess because of your righteousness, for you are a stiff-necked people.”  There is nothing I could do to ever earn or deserve the time that I have had here in Uganda. In fact, I am still unsure as to why exactly the Lord has chosen me for this mission. Me, a lousy Christian who should never have received a second, third, fourth, or fifth chance at redemption. However, in the time that I have been here, the Lord has once again proven His divine grace as many of the demons I struggle with have surfaced, from lust to jealousy and perhaps, just maybe, it is the Lord giving me the sixth chance I do not deserve to heal me from these things with which I have so deeply struggled with throughout my life. To withdraw from the routine of the normal and propel into the routine of the abnormal is to face the struggles that chain me to the enemy. It is to battle my demons forcefully, being complet

1 Corinthians 1:3 “Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.” Grace. I have come across this word countless times during my field time. It is the basis of my devotional book and nearly every time I open my Bible, there is a reference to His grace somewhere between the lines. Coincidence? Absolutely not. I believe grace is my theme for this season of my life and although I am still learning what this word truly means in the eyes of Jesus, I can still admire the life He has given me through His grace everyday. Grace is more than what we extend to others when they have wronged us, grace is what we run to Jesus to receive when we have wronged Him. It is more than just an acceptance to apology, it is a slate wiped clean, moment by moment. Through His grace, I am set free from a life of condemnation, guilt, and shame. I am set free from the regrets of my past because my sin is covered by His divine grace, love, and understanding. This by no means insures me t

Revelation 21:5 “Then He who sat on the throne said, “Behold, I make all things new.” And He said to me, “Write, for these words are true and faithful.” I no longer have to be ashamed of who I am or what I have done, because by His grace, I am covered; I am made new. Though oftentimes, it seems as though I am at a standstill in my walk with the Lord, I trust that He is in control and that I am exactly where I need to be in His will for my life. As difficult as this can be, I must press on, because though these times are challenging, Romans 8:18 reminds that, “…the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.” Like clay in the Potter’s hand, I am unsure as to what it is that He is doing but I know for certain that the outcome will be beyond anything I could ever hope for or imagine. I just have to continue on in the way of His Word, being faithful to go in whatever direction He has me to go even if it was not the direct